Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
