walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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