Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
