im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
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