I looked at my own cervix.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
