Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
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