You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Randomize
