Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
