I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
