Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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