maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Randomize
