I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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