Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
