I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
