It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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