This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
