He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
