In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
