How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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