This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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