Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
