At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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