STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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