i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Randomize
