i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Randomize
