marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
