I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
