you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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