Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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