Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Randomize
