some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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