Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
We don't watch enough power rangers
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
