I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
There's a naked man in my car right now.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
