saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
