hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Rumble strips road head = magical
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
