found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
