Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
