I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
