i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
