do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
