i was born a porn star she said
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
i used baking grease as lip gloss
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
