Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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