Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
No I am not eating basil off your cock
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Randomize
