You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
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