About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize
