nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize
