i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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