Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Randomize
