I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
is that a dick in a sweater?
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
