im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
